GUARDS, GUARDS

RIVA’DANTE!

hello world and welcome to a stereo typical 1120 AD English settlement, what a glorious fun stricken day it is to be beaten within an inch of your life by the friendly "just" town guards vigorously patrolling the stockades in search of any moved spec or sign of difference.. Quickly and surely to deliver divine retribution to all who oppose the will and rights of the "just".

Oh how fun it is to have late night entertainment of "RUN FROM THE ANGRY TOWN GUARDS" everyone’s a winner, mark my words...

Because the winners get a free beating or loss a limb for the greater good or sometimes... just sometimes get a good killing!

With prizes like that... its no wonder starving peasents and blood crazed children are found scampering to the well for water to partch their wretched, unworthy bodies...

That is where the town guards step in...
To make sure their well isn’t contaminated by the touch of "lower" classed people. And if you happen to be a distant relative of a slave... or even a direct relate of a slave... gods above hace mercy on your existance and smite you down in your place now.. For if your family link is know, you will be given the grueling task of scrapping out the Royal toilet... 4 times a week until death..
It’s for king and country... no dont look at me like that...
It’s ROYAL! Therefore completely a respectable and honest mans job...

Only fit for the select few mind you... it takes a man the abbility to not throw up when forced to work, eat and sleep in the royal toilet chamber 24 hours a day.. And if with any luck... barter your days rations with the guards... allowed a grand hours worth of sunlight from the cell's sky roof the next room over.

Ah... losing track i was... tis back to the wonderful exploration and story of our common English 1120 town structure... we have the palacade... its mighty hand carved wooden spikes, used for so many different things.. Like impaling the witches on it... oh boy... what will the peasents think of next for party tricks?!

And then we have the farming section...
Here we find the topless, pant less under wear only freaks that have nothing but the capacity to throw a pick into the ground and rake, day in, day out, 365 days a year, 8755 hours a year... yes for those mathematician wiz kids... YES I KNOW I LEFT OUT 5 HOURS! GOD YOU GUYS ARE LOSERS FOR WORKING THAT OUT!
*ahem* the 5 hours are for children crafting, toilet stops and praying to god for a swift and just end from this life...

Moving on. We have the wonderful notation of the "MOSH PITS"
These aren’t you common dancing pits... no way my good fellows...
These are you gritty, wet mud, dirt harvesting golems... which collect and sort ROYAL MUD and commoner’s mud from the piles to build houses with. And the fun ritual of random whippings is a daily activity for the frustrated town guards when their salary decreases, or increases... or even if it doesnt even change... those town guards... what a great bunch... they always think of a reason to give those poor unworthy peasents a good beating.. Just what they wanted too I bet...

As you can see, life was pretty exciting back then, men could be put to the guillotine for simple amusement or even a community get together was a good reason to use the guillotine... oh. I chuckle to myself when I heard "Hey mother, the next door neighbor’s son is getting diced for looking at the King the other day! Tell the relatives! And go harvest some more oats for gruel tomorrow!"

And there you have it... this is Jeffa's interprutation of the common life of a 1120 English town... thank you all and i hope you found this as exciting as i did!

God save the town guards /sigh of happiness